- The Village Chronicles -

In August of 2006, Benjamin Dean Box made the trek up I35 and moved into an unsuspecting Village apartment with Kendal Scott Haug...the city of Dallas will never be the same. All stories recounted here are intended for the purpose of documenting history, are written with journalistic integrity (they are accurate), and may be retold and/or embellished at the reader's wishes.

The Day the Vulture Died
Wednesday, September 19, 2007

This one time, I went bird hunting with this guy, and he was a little blood-thirsty/trigger happy. We were hunting for dove, which look like this:

But this guy either didn't seem to care what we were hunting for -or- can't see real well because he shot one of these:

As you probably guessed, this guy was and is the Box.

My favorite part of this was that he was sitting in a lawn chair in the front yard drinking a cold one, when he blasted the innocent victim from the sky without getting up, let out a nice chuckle, and didn't even bother to get up from his chair to skope out the carcass that landed 40 ft in front of him.

A Vulture!? Is that even legal, you ask? No, no it is not.

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posted by Kendal @ 11:38 AM, ,




Baring It All...Or At Least Too Much
Friday, August 31, 2007

I don't know if this picture makes it easier or harder to pray for this girl. She wore this recently to court for a custody battle to get her kids.I'm not sure what's up with the random posting of pics, but I just couldn't not post this.

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posted by Kendal @ 9:56 AM, ,




Can I Have Your Digits?
Monday, August 27, 2007

The other day I drove to the bank to make a deposit for work. I went around to the drive through and used the commercial lane, which is right up against the side of the bank building. I gave the teller the checks and deposit slip and waited for the receipt. Not only did I get back my receipt, but I also got a lovely note from Teresa...
Dearest Teresa,

How desperate do you think I am!? Even if I was just really shallow, I do not even know what you look like. Is this truly the way the rest of the world operates!?

Sincerely Yours,
Kendal

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posted by Kendal @ 9:01 AM, ,




What Does That Stand For?
Thursday, August 23, 2007

Acronyms are all around us. There are an estimated 3 million commonly accepted acronyms, and there is even an acronym dictionary. Did you know the longest acronym is ADCOMSUBORDCOMPHIBSPAC, a United States Navy term that stands for "Administrative Command, Amphibious Forces, Pacific Fleet Subordinate Command." The world's longest initialism (slightly different than an acronym), according to the Guinness Book of World Records is NIIOMTPLABOPARMBETZHELBETRABSBOMONIMON
KONOTDTEKHSTROMONT. The 56-letter initialism is from the Concise Dictionary of Soviet Terminology and means "The laboratory for shuttering, reinforcement, concrete and ferroconcrete operations for composite monolithic and monolithic constructions of the Department of the Technology of Building-assembly operations of the Scientific Research Institute of the Organization for building mechanization and technical aid of the Academy of Building and Architecture of the USSR." Awesome!

All that to say, last night The Box and I had the privilege of hanging out with some fine ladies, and I do mean fine. I highly encourage you to check out their in-desperate-need-of-a-new-template blog here. Somehow conversation eventually winded around towards the fine products of a certain Yogurt shop (A few of the ladies were somewhat obsessed with the comfort that the milky-smooth goodness of TCBY provided).

"What does that stand for?," someone asked. "The Country's Best Yogurt," Brittain so confidently exclaimed. "Really?," I questioned back. "I thought it stood for This Can't Be Yogurt!" Brittain then proceeded to laugh in my face as she assured me, "I should know, I have been going there every day since the 2nd grade." A quick table-wide debate ensued, during which, everyone seemed to think I was an idiot. LC then chimed in, "I think TCBY was started in Arkansas (where she grew up and her parents still live), let's call and ask my Dad." I thought this sounded like a great idea, so we quickly got him on the line. I made some small talk with Reggie and then got the complete history of the TCBY franchise in under 3 minutes. I take back all the nasty things I have ever said about the people of Arkansas because Reggie is a first-class individual.

Here is what I learned from Reggie, which was later confirmed by Wikipedia: The franchise was originally named This Can't Be Yogurt!, was later sued, and then changed its name to The Country's Best Yogurt. Oh the Glory! It is alright Brittain, I accept your apology. Reggie, you are a gentleman and a scholar.

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posted by Kendal @ 3:51 PM, ,




Barf!
Thursday, August 16, 2007

As I found out this morning, the human body is not designed to eat 10½ $1 hot dogs in one sitting.

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posted by Kendal @ 12:01 PM, ,




F@#K!
Friday, July 20, 2007

Apparently, listening to live concerts that have a high probability of shouting out certain four-letter words while working for a fine establishment such as Bible.org without the safety of headphones is a bad idea. At least that is my experience.

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posted by Kendal @ 9:34 AM, ,




I Pissed It All Away at the Track
Monday, July 9, 2007

Big B came up to Big D this past weekend for some equine fun, and I think it fair to say he was not disappointed. After a good hearty breakfast to start the Saturday off right, we began to prepare for our outing, which is aptly described as "fun for the whole family" (what isn't these days). As with any good outing, costumes were mandatory. And after printing out some insider info on each race from "Rick's Picks," The Box, B, and I headed off to Lonestar Park to see what this whole horse racing thing was about. We arrived at the track just in time for the second race...

For whatever reason, the people we met at the track thought that we were experts in the ways of horse racing. It probably had something to do with The Box's all-access pass from the casinos that he had draped around his neck. We received such comments as, "nice look!", "now that's what I'm talking about!", "can you guys teach me how to win some money?", and "wow, did you guys lose a bet!?" I found the citizens at the track to be quite uplifting.

Big B was eager to jump in on the action and he quickly placed a bet on the first race for a horse to show (get in the top 3), a bet which we would later find out was laughable to "the regulars". However, B won that first action, a bet that netted him a quarter. "You have to start somewhere", I encouraged him, and "A sign of things to come", The Box chimed in.

Having sat out the first race to get our bearings, the Box and I were feeling ready and prepared to make a killing on the second race. It didn't work out for me...

However, The Box had apparently guessed right, actually he guessed the first 3 horses right, which as he understandably figured should reap him some serious green. He was elated...

Needless to say, he was more than a little disappointed to find out that he had actually ended up losing money from his winning ticket. It turns out that The Box had not communicated clearly enough to Glen (the clerk) what he had wanted to bet on. "That's just the way it goes at the track sometimes, " reasoned Glen. After a 20 minute calm-and-collected verbal exchange between Glen and The Box, Scott, a regular at the track, stepped in to help ease the tension. Scott and The Box quickly became friends and Scott began to impart all of his years of knowledge onto The Box. A short run-down spilled over into Scott joining us at our table with his notepad, tutoring us on the ways of the $1 Trifecta, the Quinella, and the ever-rewarding Superfecta-Box. We were now ready to take on the system.

Busted bet after busted bet led us to realize that Scott had failed to mention that we were probably going to lose anyways. I was able to place one bet that netted me $20 and helped me avoid a total collapse at the track like my fellow companions. Combined we were down a decent amount, but there was one last race, one last chance at redemption, one last opportunity to cash in on the glory. We placed our bets, gathered at the finish line, and watched on with anticipation...

As the race wore on and the horses came down the stretch we needed the number 2 horse (Upstream) to eek out a victory and all would be restored. It came down to Upstream making a late push on the number 4 horse at the wire. After a photo finish and much hand-wringing, we had come up an inch short. Oh the torture! We left a little battered...


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posted by Kendal @ 9:44 AM, ,




Planes, Trains, & Friendship Rings
Tuesday, April 3, 2007

Two weeks ago I flew to Omaha, Neb. to hang out with some good friends and see what was going on in their local church. Highlights included hosting a tournament for the church of a made-up game (made-up games are crucial to every man's existence), enjoying a few pints of Guinness on St. Patty's Day, and hearing about the life of St. Patrick on Sunday morning. It was a great trip.

On the flight back to Big D I had a fairly meaningful and totally humorous encounter with the guy sitting next to me, who was visiting his fiance in Omaha over the weekend. Hunter was 2 years older than I was, and he worked at an air conditioning company in Lewisville. The conversation started up just like any other would, with me trying to be funny, but coming across as more awkward than anything else. Hunter didn't seem to mind though, and we began to become acquainted. After telling him that I recently graduated from seminary and sharing a few of my passions, Hunter was convinced that I was a pastor of some sort and his tone changed.

It was actually a beautifully meaningful conversation, during which I was able to share with Hunter why I thought a relationship with the person of Jesus was relevant, not only to the human problem, but to his life as well. He listened intently to everything I had to say, and would interject every so often with stories from his own life. He told me about being raised by his mother, and how important the sanctity of the Bible was to her. Then, noticing that I had a few tatoos of my own, he began to ask me about the morality of putting marks on your body. After showing me his own tatoos, he shared that some of his friends told him that this wasn't right and he was confused. I shared with him my thoughts on the matter, and talked a little about what the Law in the Old Testament was and how Jesus came to fulfill and free us from bondage to it. I read to him from Romans 8, where Paul says that what the Law was unable to do, God was able to accomplish through Jesus. He seemed to like that answer.

Things went on like this for the duration of the flight, with the conversation mostly centered around Christian Spirituality. Hunter was a fine flying companion, and I would be sad to see him leave. He apparently shared the same sentiment.

As the plane landed and then made the taxi to the terminal, Hunter thanked me for the conversation and told me if I ever needed some AC work done to give him a call. I promised him that I would and that I enjoyed getting to know him for the past hour. We each grabbed our carry-ons and headed out the jetway. Just as we were approaching the clearance, he stopped and asked for me to wait. He began to fidget with his hand, and I suddenly realized what he was doing - He wanted to give me his ring. I was pretty taken aback, and not knowing how to respond, I did one of those "Oh, I couldn't possibly..." sort of things. He insisted, telling me that the ring symbolized the Ten Commandments, with a roman numeral for each across the band. I took it, thanked him, and we parted ways.

It wasn't until I got into my car that I took a good look at the ring my new-found friend had given me. I was releaved to see that he had not given me anything too valuable, and I couldn't help but chuckle a bit over the exchange. Then, as I turned the ring around, my chuckle became a full-out laugh. My Ten Commandments ring had 12 roman numerals!

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posted by Kendal @ 8:30 AM, ,




Beer: What's the Difference?
Thursday, March 29, 2007

Over Spring Break, the Box and I embarked on a ski trip with my fam (and a few folks from our church) to Breckenridge, Colorado. The weather was great and the snow was equally satisfying. The Box and I got to ski at 3 different areas (Arapahoe Basin, Breckenridge, and Vail), nearly broke our legs and skis trying to perform a 360 on an obnoxiously big jump, and lost my little brother on the slopes during our first day for an undisclosed amount of time. All in all it was a fine trip.

Every evening we would gather together for a rather large family dinner, where we would break bread together and share our various mishaps from the day. The meal usually centered around fellowship, but was always full of hilarity and prodding. -- The evening of The Beer Tasting was no exception.

You see, there was a long-standing quarrel in the Haug family over the difference between light beers, or the lack thereof. My dad was on one side and most everyone else on the other (my step-mom being the strongest opposed). Basically, the majority argument went like this: A trained palette can tell the difference between the major light beers. The Beer Tasting was the logical climax to the heated debate. Which side would prevail?

Here were the stated rules of governance: There would be 4 beers - Miller Lite, Coors Light, Keystone, and Bud Light. Each contestant would be blindfolded by the Minister of Beer (myself), the beers would be poured into 4 separate cups and administered one at a time, and the contestant could taste all 4 before making up his/her mind on each one. Once the final answers were given, the results (and verdict) would be revealed.

One by one the contestants approached the table of truth, and each time they failed (much to the delight of my dad). Each contestant seemed to have his/her own strategy: slowly taking each one in, using all of the senses before making a determination, tasting each one 10 times, and my personal strategy of chugging each one. However, none proved successful, and 50% was the best success rate anyone could muster.

But there was one who had yet to approach the table. One who was more qualified than all the rest. One who was weaned on beer from birth. One who prefers beer with his cereal, instead of the customary milk. One who once killed a man for looking at his beer with lust. This man is…the Box, aka The Hero of Hops, aka The Speculator of Suds, aka The Charlatan of Ale, aka The Epitome of All Things Beer. He approached the table of truth with an arrogant confidence, and tauntingly played to the crowd. One at a time he absorbed the cups of beer into his very existence, pausing once, only to engage his audience in the story. He calmly proclaimed his answers, as if he were simply communicating a truth to mere laymen. By the end of the exhibition there were no doubts – we were in the presence of greatness. All hail the King of Beer!

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posted by Kendal @ 1:06 PM, ,




Blues & Tattoos
Monday, March 5, 2007

One of my Christmas presents this year was tickets to see Eric Clapton in San Antonio. Clapton was the only remaining of my living musical heroes that I had yet to see. Clapton's Unplugged album is among the top 5 albums of all time, and that is just a fact. I was able to check his name off that list this past weekend. There was a group of six of us that all had tickets, and so it was a weekend filled with awesome stories.

I had called Big B (pictured right) earlier in the week to make sure he was as excited as I was about seeing Slowhand live, and he informed me during the phone call that he and my brother Josh were going to get tattoos later that night. I convinced B that if he waited, I would get one with them when I came down. So, as I cruised into the live music capitol of the world on Friday night, I was still trying to decide what would permanently mark my body in a few short hours. I had some ideas at this point, but the details were a bit unclear. Nevertheless, I felt confident that I could make a quick decision under the impending pressure of the needle.

I arrived at Rufus, and the tattoo clan gathered in order to gain some much needed reassurance of our theoretical body art. Josh quickly solidified his plans and printed out his Hebrew lettering that would vertically decorate the right side of his rib cage. B simply needed to decide what font he wanted for his capitol letter "B" that was to occupy his left shoulder blade. I still had no idea, but I wasn't worried.

After picking up a few people who wanted to witness the event, we made our way to the parlor of choice, Atomic Tattoo. Josh decided to go first, and I calmly tried to sort things out while B was in a pretty frantic state, scouring through hundreds of font selections. I checked in on Josh, only to to find him riving in pain as if he was having his leg amputated. I told him to "hang in there," and I went back to work. I overheard an awesome conversation between The Ros and Eric (our tattoo artist) where Eric informed her that he recently moved to Austin because Colorado was simply "no place to raise a family."

After roughly 35 minutes, Eric was finished with Josh's tattoo (sorry for not having a pic, but The Ros had a brain-fart) and it was time for me to step up to the inking table. For a while now I have wanted to get the phrase "Dead to Sin" put on my forearm and I even had a font I felt comfortable with, but the placement was causing me much trouble and hesitancy. I simply could not reach a secure level confidence to move forward, so I decided to save that idea for later and move on to the backup plan. I had in the back of mind that if this situation played out as it had, that I would get a verse reference on my hand between my thumb and pointer finger. I proceeded to tell Eric what I wanted, after which he completely crushed my plans by telling me that he could not insure anything that he put on my hand. He said that if something were to go wrong with the tattoo, that I would have to pay to get it fixed. I was devastated at the news. I debated about whether or not to take the risk, but decided I was pressing a little bit at this point. Then I asked for Eric's opinion on my Dead to Sin indecision; hilarity ensued.

Eric proceeded to give me a sermon on the art of designing a tattoo. He was getting a little defensive thinking that I did not respect his profession by not planning to consult him on the design of my tattoo. Simply putting a phrase on your body was not art in his opinion. He told me that the forearm was "prime real-estate" for the placement of a tattoo, and it should be treated as a "canvas," with careful thought and planning. After listening to his rant and trying to convince him that, despite my shortcomings with this whole tattoo/art thing, I was still worthy of his time. I asked him of some possible things I could due to enhance the quality and dignity of my original idea. He got some tracing paper, placed it on my forearm, and proceeded to draw out his creation. I saved his art for the sake of the blog...

I almost lost it when he started to draw the clouds and bird-like animal above the cross with the rays of sunlight beaming down. I didn't really know what to say at this point or how to break it to Eric that, despite what it might seem, I wasn't really Mexican. Eric talked to B a little bit about the art of choosing a font, and then told us that he was closing the shop for the night and it was time for us to leave. I was a little disappointed that I was leaving without anything to show for my time, but I decided to put it behind me.

We headed to a little pub nearby Rufus that turned out to be a rather crowded pub with probably the greatest Hair/80's cover band I have ever seen. LC Rocks covered such hits as Pour Some Sugar On Me, You Shook Me All Night Long, Living On a Prayer, Paradise City, Enter Sandman, and many more tasty licks. One member of our entourage was so moved that he got up on a table and started "dancing" with a member of the opposite sex. It was awesome!

The weekend ended with a short hike down to San Antonio to see the legendary member of Cream rock it out. And he did. After a nice romantic dinner on the river walk, during which B downed a 60 oz. margarita all by himself, we cruised over to the AT&T Center for the show. Clapton sandwiched a 4 song sit-down acoustic stretch in between two full blues jam sessions. Some highlights included: a rendition of Hendrix's Little Wing, Nobody Knows You When You're Down and Out, Runnin' on Faith, Layla, and an encore consisting of Cocaine and Crossroads where he was joined by Jimmie Vaughan. I found the arrangements to be refreshingly soulful, and of course Clapton was magical. Even at a venue (actually stadium) as void and lacking of character as it was, it was a great musical performance and I might add...a sweet little weekend.

I would like to throw two shout-outs: 1) To the Kennedy Center for having such a good attitude, and 2) To Rachel -- You are welcome. Even though I almost died dodging falling tree branches, I feel that the home-front is a much safer place.

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posted by Kendal @ 2:30 PM, ,




Lesson Learned, Part 2
Thursday, February 22, 2007

This list is a continuation of random lessons I learned throughout my time on the hallowed grounds of Dallas Theological Seminary:

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posted by Kendal @ 10:15 AM, ,




A Review of Sorts
Thursday, February 8, 2007

I have something to confess: I am a sucker for a good live music performance. Whether it be in person or on TV, indie or pop, acoustic or otherwise, I believe that a great live musical performance is the pinnacle of entertainment. And it's more than just the music. It's about what story the songs tell, both individually and as a set, engaging one another, accompanying the listener along the way. It's about the imperfection of live music: the missed notes, unpolished guitar riffs, and lyrical shortcomings -- because that's too much like life. It's about the emotion, the energy, and the metaphors that wear so many hats. And sometimes, just sometimes, it's about getting a glimpse of grace that transcends everything else at that moment. Then there are other times when it's about Prince and all his splendor...the Super Bowl half-time show was one such time.

Not too long ago, the half-time show was quickly headed towards becoming a freak sideshow until the infamous nipple event occurred that forced the producers to change their focus. They then reclaimed the glory of the half-time show by getting Paul McCartney to lead the nation and myself (standing on my couch in the living room at the time) in a chorus of Hey Jude. The legendary Beatle gave meaning back to what had become a joke. His performance was moving and graceful. Then the following year, in what can only be described as a momentary lapse of judgment, the higher-ups decided to put four walking skeletons on-stage, also known as The Rolling Stones. However, I was willing to forgive-and-forget because redemption sounded sweet when Prince was announced as the entertainment for Super Bowl XLI.

As I'm sure the Box was sick of hearing, I had been looking forward to this performance ever since I heard that Prince would be headlining the event. What would he play? What would he wear? Which guitars would he use? Would anyone be joining him on stage? Could he still move like he used to? These are just some of the questions that were going through my head. Now some of you are thinking, "Wow! I never pegged you for a Prince fan." Well sue me! The man can play the guitar, and he is one of the greatest entertainers of our time. He has some of the top performances on SNL that I have seen, and despite our spiritual disagreements, I love me some Prince! OK there, I said it. Now, on to my thoughts from the show...

His performance at Super Bowl XLI will surely go down as one of the most thrilling halftime shows ever and perhaps the best. He left nothing out as he covered numerous hits like Proud Mary by CCR, which led into All Along the Watchtower by Bob Dylan, and then went straight into the Foo Fighter's Best of You. The heavy rain made the smoke and lights seem mysterious, instead of merely ridiculous. He cast himself behind a sheet, leaving his poetic silhouette, which was only overshadowed by his stage presence. He tossed his bandana into the crowd as he ended his set most fittingly with a convincing and compelling rendition of Purple Rain as the sky continued to pour down in approval.

Deny the magnificence of the performance all you want, but who are you to argue with Mother Nature?

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posted by Kendal @ 11:21 AM, ,




Beef Ribs
Thursday, January 18, 2007

Today was my birthday, and it was pretty sweet. Here was how it ended...




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posted by Kendal @ 9:52 PM, ,




Lesson Learned, Part 1
Sunday, January 14, 2007

I am a recent proud graduate of Dallas Theological Seminary, as I have stated here before. Here is a short list of random things I learned throughout my time in grad school:

There are more to come…

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posted by Kendal @ 10:30 PM, ,




Driving Rain
Monday, January 1, 2007

The windshield wipers on my car haven't worked the past 4 months or so. I was hoping that fixing this would be as simple as replacing a fuse, but no luck. I was pretty sure that I was going to have to spend money that I didn't have to get them fixed, and how important are windshield wipers anyways, so I just went without. It's actually not that bad when you are going fast because the rain tends to roll off the windshield fast enough to enable viewing the other cars. However, when driving at night, not having windshield wipers makes it pretty tough to not hit other cars or obstacles. When another car's headlights are shining on you it is nearly impossible to see through a wiper-less windshield. Driving behind a semi-truck is miserable, and forget about seeing when a passing car drives through a puddle and kicks even more water onto an already blurry situation. A 3-hour trip in a monsoon coming back from hunting helped me realize all of this. But simply avoiding these situations has allowed me to post-pone the so-called required maintenance for a few months, or until June, when my next inspection is due.

Two weeks ago I woke up to a pounding rainstorm, but I wasn't impressed. I had taken on worse than this, so I jumped in the car and headed to work. However, for some reason this particular morning, my windshield was not shedding the rain quick enough. I immediately pulled over and waited for it to let up a bit. When I saw a hint of hope, I decided to get back on the road, but as soon as I got on the highway the second coming of Noah's flood began and I almost died 5 times. I knew I wasn't going to make it to work, but in a moment of brilliance, I pulled into my local Autozone and purchased some Rain-X to boost my chances of survival. Well, as it turns out, Rain-X doesn't work quite as well when your windshield is already drenched in water and the rain is still coming down. Nevertheless, I did my best to apply whatever it was in those Rain-X pads to my car (which I'm pretty sure was just some rubbing alcohol in a baby wipe). They did allow me to make it into work that day, which was more due to the fact that the rain let up right after I was through applying the mystery wipes.

My brother and sister were sufficiently worried, that they paid to have my wipers fixed for Christmas. I guess they work alright now.

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posted by Kendal @ 9:00 AM, ,




Christmas Recap
Friday, December 29, 2006

Another Christmas has come and gone, and both the Box and I spent the holidays in Austin with our families. I didn't see the Box our entire time in Austin (It felt like half of me was dead), so this will be a recap of Christmas at the Haug's.

I think this Christmas, for me, can be summed up in two words: family and food (notice the 2 Fs pastor Box). It was a great time of fellowship and teasing, hanging out with all of my fam for 4 days. Coming home also means eating a lot of good food. You see, the fam thinks that I do not eat very well when I am up in Dallas. Actually, they think that I do not eat at all, which may or may not be true. So, every time I go home now, I feel like Hansel and Gretel being fattened up by the old woman for the slaughter. Pork tenderloin, beef tenderloin, steak, homemade rolls, Grandma Annon's apple pie, chocolate pecan pie, and on and on.

Some of my extended family came over to celebrate the holidays in the only way my Dad knows how…Karaoke Christmas. 2 hours of singing the classics gets a little old, but don't worry, there's always country's greatest hits to liven' up the crowd. The funniest sight was seeing my Dad play the role of choir conductor during a number of the songs, dramatically directing each person when to come in and fade out. Belsnickel left some goodies on the doorstep for all to enjoy, Winston ate 37 rolls, and my new-found brother-in-law was just trying to figure out what the heck was going on. The biggest development of the night was finding out that my pregnant cousin Kristen has officially decided to name her child Kendal Jr., which is exciting.

After opening presents on Christmas morning at my Dad's and experiencing several Christmas Miracles (similar to a Festivus Miracle), we headed over to my Mom's for more indulgence and presents. Some of my gifts included: quite a few Neil Young records on vinyl to add to my fast-growing collection, tickets to see Clapton in San Antonio, and several gift cards to make sure I eat while I am in Dallas (one to IHOP and another to the grocery store). By the way, I was given two tickets to see Clapton, which means that there is one left over for a special someone. That someone could be you, with the right persuasion of course.

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posted by Kendal @ 10:01 AM, ,




Krystal Burger
Wednesday, December 20, 2006

The other day, while running a few errands for work, I came across a Krystal Burger. I had no idea we had one of these in Texas, let alone in Big D, so I decided that I must stop in and grab a few tiny sandwiches for lunch. I ordered 6 Krystal burgers with cheese and sat down with the day's paper to catch up on the latest happenings. I get my food, start to munch on some delicious finger food, and I over-hear the following conversation from a couple and their two sons sitting at the table next to me:

Mom: "Alright, well after we finish eating Bobby (about 7 years old), you are coming with me to the grocery store and then I will take you to soccer practice. And Sam, you are going with your Dad for the afternoon."

Immediately after this Bobby lets out an excited "Yes!"

Dad (taken aback): "What was that for? Why are you so excited about going with Mom?"

Bobby (with no hesitation): "You yell at me all the time and Mommy doesn't. I don't like going to soccer practice with you."

A few moments of awkward silence ensue and then all hell breaks loose as the Dad begins to weep out loud. The Mom is stunned at the unforeseen waterworks and is at a sudden loss for words. I look around to see if anyone else is watching this and notice that all eyes are on Captain Vulnerable. I quickly ponder my options at this point and, being the full manifestation of compassion and kindness that I am, I decide there is only one option. I got up, threw my trash away, walked towards their table, and got the hell out of there! Are you kidding me!?

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posted by Kendal @ 12:16 PM, ,




Graduates
Friday, December 15, 2006

As of yesterday the Box and I are both graduates. The only difference: This is my 2nd degree and the Box just finished his undergraduate work. Hey, I'm just sayin'. We celebrated last night with an episode of The Office, an oversized dish of lasagna, and a few Sam Adams.

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posted by Kendal @ 1:16 PM, ,




What's in a Name?
Tuesday, December 5, 2006

Meet my brother Josh. Josh is a 7th grade history teacher and basketball coach in Austin. He hasn't had time for much of anything lately due to the enormous amount of time it takes to be a slave for a high school football team. However he did find some time to become interested in a certain sweet young lady. Meet Rosalyn (aka The Roz). At first Rosalyn was a bit turned off by Josh and his Haug charm. Now I know what you are thinking, "Stop it, that isn't possible." Well, she apparently claims my brother is a bit arrogant, too wild, and a little loud. And your point? Despite these setbacks, Josh was able to win her over with his boyish good-looks and because Rosalyn was lying the whole time when she said that she wasn't in love with him. They are now dating, and I hear from a few good sources that they spend every waking hour together. Some of Josh's friends thought it would be appropriately funny to start referring to Josh and Rosalyn as one person, Josalyn. Josh, for some reason, does not find the newfound nickname funny at all. So, I pose this question to the blog: How funny is the nickname Josalyn? You can vote on the poll just to the right in the sidebar. Feel free also to add a comment on your thoughts and why you voted as you did.

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posted by Kendal @ 9:50 AM, ,




Thanksgiving Recap
Sunday, December 3, 2006

Last week was Thanksgiving as everyone knows, and the Box and I were in Austin for some all around good times. I thought I would give a quick recap of some of the highlights that made up our weekend of giving thanks. I would also like to add that I am officially thankful for my roommate the Box. Without him this blog would be…well it wouldn't exist actually.

The Box and I headed down to Austin Wednesday night and we had a meaningful car ride. The conversation was touching and deep; the Box even started crying. But that's just the Box. He's an emotional giant. We did have to stop in Waco so the Box could relieve his tiny bladder, and once back on the road, I drove while the Box proceeded to compile a random top 5 list for some stellar categories that will be revealed on the blog in due time. Looking for a place to dine in Austin? Just you wait.

Once we made it to Austin the Box decided to spurn his family for one more night and hang with the boys at Rufus (Let me explain Rufus quickly: Rufus has a sort of existential existence. It is a state of being and its essence is preceded by its existence. Rufus is pure and unadulterated goodness. In layman's terms: Rufus is my brother and Big B's house). The Box and I crashed on the couch that night, and no, not on the same couch.

The next morning when the Box finally awoke from his hibernation, I took him over to his house. The lovely Kathy Box invited me in for some brief catch-up time and tempted me to stay for lunch with some sweet aromas coming form the kitchen. I was not able to stay, but I did get to catch a priceless early opening of Christmas presents by the entire Box family from Nana (details excluded). After hearing how Kaley (Ben's sister) had recently spurned a suitor who wrote a song for her to ask her on a first-date and then acted like everything was fine by playing racquetball with him the next morning and trying to turn his romantic attention towards her roommate, I headed over to B's parents house for the 2nd annual Barry/Haug Thanksgiving extravaganza. Let me just say 2 words: delicious. Well that's one word, but you get the point. Momma Barry makes the best stuffing this side of the Mason-Dixon line and that Poppa Barry sure knows how to entertain. I got a brief run-down on the Barry family history while I had a piece of all 3 pies that were prepared for dessert; the trophy went to the apple.

Friday was a blur and I don't recall anything of significance taking place. Then the weekend ended with the Box and Mrs. Kathy coming over to my parents house for the Haug's world famous fajitas on Saturday night. The company was divine, the food was even better, and the beer ran out unfortunately. We played a great game (thanks Jax) that we hope to introduce to the blog with some pics shortly, and then we had little brother roasting time. You see I have 3 younger brothers, 2 of which haven't graduated high school yet. Zac, the youngest, is in 7th grade and lets just say he takes after his oldest brother and is quite the ladies man. It was Zac's birthday about a month ago and he had received numerous homemade cards from some of his friends that he kept in his room (big mistake). And when I say friends, I mean girls. He probably had 25 different girls write him a letter or a message of some sort. Of course being the good older brother that I am, I preceded to read some of these messages to the group for everyone to enjoy. Most of them were heart-warming notes of encouragement telling Zac how cute he was, but there was one letter that took it to the next level and stood out. I believe this young ladie's name was Jennifer and the line that caught my attention went like this: "Zac, you make me snicker. You satisfy my soul!" We rolled on the ground with laughter for a good ten minutes. T-shirts are in production.

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posted by Kendal @ 9:48 AM, ,




The Authors

Kendal Haug

Kendal is a graduate of the University of Texas in Austin and most recently earned his Masters in Biblical Studies from Dallas Theological Seminary. He works for Bible.org and likes to think he knows how to play the guitar. His man-crushes include, but are not limited to: Ryan Adams, Donald Miller, Ray LaMontagne, Neil Young, Vince Young, and of course The Box.

Ben Box

Box, is a recent graduate of Texas A&M University and currently works for Medco Construction building hospitals and being important. Ben loves paying lots of money on broken down Jeeps and has a propensity for getting Kendal into trouble.

About This Blog

This is a multi-author blog devoted to the happenings of two bachelors living it up in Big D. We will record the daily nonsense that occurs when 2 life-long friends live together in the same apartment and have no shame, sense of fashion, or chance of meeting a girl in the next 10 years.

A Word on Comments

Ben and Kendal both highly encourage your comments. They look forward to hearing your thoughts and insights. No matter how harsh the criticism or if you just want to give them a good ole pat on the back and say "Way to Go!" or "Ha! That was a funny story!" or "That Ben sure does crack me up." And if you have a request of something you would like to see Ben and Kendal do or write about, let them know.

Disclaimer

Ben and Kendal are in no way responsible for stories that may worry, upset, or lead their parents to altogether disown them.

Contact Us

Kendal can be reached here
Ben can be reached here

Archives

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Honor Points

  • Ben: 72
    Kendal: 34

On Kendal's Ipod

On Ben's Walkman

Kendal's Reading

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Links

  • NPR Live Concert Series
    NPR is a great source for live music interviews. They are very well done and they have a range of good artists.
  • Burnside Writers Collective
    This is a collective blog of which Donald Miller (one of Kendal's man-crushes) is a part of.
  • Virtual NES
    This is a website where some dude converted all old school Nintendo games so they are playable through your internet browser. It's freaking brilliant.
  • Relevant Magazine
    This is an online magazine that has good articles about culture and Christianity with a post-modern bent.
  • Bible.org
    This is the website that Kendal works for. The mission is to provide free trustworthy Bible study resources to people all over the world. Kendal posts most of the content.
  • The Drudge Report
    The Walter Cronkite of our era. Perfect for keeping up with the news as it is updated every 30 minutes.
  • The Austinist
    Because it doesn't matter where we are, we need to know what is going on in Austin.
  • Wikipedia
    For knowledge.
  • Tiny Mix Tapes
    For inspiration.
  • Pandora
    Listen to music and help the music genome project.
  • Snopes
    Fact of Fiction?
  • The Onion
    America's Finest News Source